I recently just came out of what I would call a deep depression that lasted for about 6 years. I don’t have all the answers, but I’ve also experienced therapy (a lot) and I currently see a psychiatrist that sincerely helps me balance out my brain chemistry. Treating the depression chemically for me made it easier to manage everything else, and slowly the passive death wish (the inkling of some part of you always wanting to die) has started to disappear. I hope you keep getting and feeling better. ❤️
I am so proud of you. You don’t need any reason to feel the way you do, you don’t owe us an explanation. Thank you for sharing this intimate conversation about your mental health and life with us, I wish I could hug you because I can see that you are struggling with this situation. But I believe that you are handling it very well. I am proud of you D’Angelo. Much love man.
Thank you so much for being so vulnerable with us. I can very much relate to what you have experienced, it is incredible how debilitating not only the mental impact but the physical impact that depression and anxiety can have. I am so glad to hear that you have tuned into yourself to help alleviate your struggles and I look forward to supporting you on your road to success what ever that may be! :)
So much love to you D'Angelo. You are a such a smart and lovely man. Your mental health struggles are valid. I'm only like 6 minutes into the video but I just had to tell you how much I value your presence in this world ❤
I just wanted to comment that I have been watching your videos for a year now and what you've said in this video really resonated with me. I wanted to say further that you're not alone, and your followers support you!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3
Watching you always feels like watching a friend, no matter what your topics are (considering I don't know half the people or circumstances). I watch for you because I enjoy how you arrange words and deliver them. I noticed your absence, but know it was never my right to ask. I clicked so fast when I saw that you posted something. I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder when I was an infant before I could even speak. We definitely understand the concept of not needing a reason to feel the way we do. I'm also diagnosed with depression since around five years ago. I just got diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder and Autism this past month. It's been one heck of a ride and I don't even know the last time I really sat down and made some art, I'm a "creator" as well. I think the best part to remember is precisely what you said about going through creating what you knew gained traction to prevent your business from slowing down but then burning out on it and slowing down inevitably. Kind of how Jim Carrey said, "You can fail at what you don't want, so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love." We will always be here for you the individual, the creator, the communicator. 🖤
I hope that with the privilege and access to mental health care that he now has thanks to making six figures before the fr of 25, that he can take advantage of that blessing. Too often I see rich young content creators not tackling their issues and it’s sad to see them not taking advantage of that massive privilege afforded them. All the best D’angelo, we missed you and was genuinely worried.
D'Angelo im so proud of you for being able to open up and talk about this and your personal struggles, I can promise you're not alone and that so many people have resonated with what you've said. It has not only helped us understand but feel understood by you knowing that we're not alone in the things we feel. you never have to push yourself for content, take as many breaks as you need for however long you need, your mental health takes priority. I know depression isn't something that you can just poof away but I hope you're doing better, sending you love and support always ❤️
I’m sorry you gotta deal with all that, and even though I’m only going through a minor depressive episode rn, I know shit sucks. You seem like a cool guy, your content is great but it’s not worth you suffering, so take your time on whatever you do, you as a person is more important than a YouTube personality version of you.
Omg! I’ve missed you D’Angelo. This video speaks volumes. It’s also so validating seeing people talk about things I’ve personally struggled with. I’m happy you’re taking your time to heal you and be better for yourself. Fighting! 💜
D'Angelo, thank you for opening up to us. Fulfilling tasks when you feel empty is impossible. Dealing with burn-out, personal things, and mental challenges is tough. You deserve to take a break with uploading as long as you wish. Being aware of what you need is way more powerful than a regular upload schedule. The flow of feeling OK and then not is not easy. I wish your anxiety and depression become less and less prone in your day to day life. Be kind to yourself.
I’m sure this sentiment is echoed here and I’m not sure this will be read by you, but maybe by someone. To say you’re not alone is so cliche but I hope you feel the warmth of the weight of that because it is so true. This isn’t to make your feelings less or smaller, and it isn’t to dismiss them - but I’ve felt this way my whole life. The burden we tell ourselves that these feelings are unusual or weird are part of the spiral that feed our “part b”. The truth is - almost every person I’ve become close with, close enough to become a confidante- each of these people have simply drifted in and out of stages of not wanting to be alive. I am aware of the undercurrent I often live on top of that tells me to stop existing. You are not alone. These feelings are huge and not unusual, not weird and you don’t need to feel crazy. You are gifted to be so unable to turn yourself off or to numb yourself that you must battle this sometimes. Sometimes isn’t always, and that - in the war of the human spirit - is enough. It’s part of you. Blue is beautiful too. And you’re doing great. Better than you think. And you look fucking great
After my divorce I would have what I considered to be something like a panic attack or flashback related to abuse by my ex-husband. I would get severe abdominal cramps and my throat would close up to the point I would go into strider type gasps until I passed out. I’d wake up with a migraine and abdominal pain. I (thankfully) haven’t had such an attack in about 10 years but I still remember how crippling it was.
I love watching your videos and I am glad that you have taken time to care for yourself. I’m sorry that anxiety has overwhelmed you. I really hope you can you can get to a better place in your head. I’m so sorry that you have been going through this. It’s a good sign that you recognize that you are having destructive thoughts, so you can reach out for help when you need it.
I just realized that YouTube has shadowbanned this video.
I went to both of your channels to find it again and it wasn't there. I searched it in the bar, no go. I had to go outside of YouTube to Google the video, that's how I was linked back here. It's not showing up on your channel. :(
sending love! i can totally understand what you’re saying/going through, some days are wayyyy harder than others and they sometimes linger for longer than they need too. currently trying to get myself back on my “routine” because the sadness is wayyyyyyyyyyyy too much sometimes! not even sadness but the void. just know you’re not alone and people are here for you! never be ashamed (bc that’s what i feel like) to ask for help!!!!! help will always be there ❤️❤️ hope you are feeling better and REMEMBER! YOU CAN DO IT! ❤️
I’m really glad you shared this part of yourself with us. As a creator myself, the way you explained your overwhelming desire to create essentially causing your anxiety perfectly articulated the cycle I’m constantly dealing with. When there is no inspiration, it’s almost like this monster inside me gets angry that I’m not feeding it ideas. And there’s this fear around not feeling anything but the weight of my feelings is sometimes so unbearable, those feelings often manifesting in very physical ways. Am I just a masochist? Lol. I’m glad you’re doing okay. Creating things that bring you joy are really important, not only to you but to anyone who is a witness 💞
feeling incredibly seen right now. I am currently in what is probably the longest period of feeling exactly what you've described here, and it's been affecting my work, which is a creative endeavor about which I'm extremely excited and happy to be doing. thank you for sharing, I'm happy to see something (relatively) new from you. just know that I, along with countless others who got here way before me, see you, and understand what it is you're going through.
I know exactly what you’re talking about, I go through all of that as well, always take care of yourself first and foremost even if it means that this year your goal is to post multiple videos but you can only post a few, don’t beat yourself up about it because I think we all get it entirely ♥️♥️♥️
Oh and also, don’t feel obligated to cover really messed up stories just to cover them, because other people will ♥️
Thank you. I can only imagine how much strength it took to share this with everyone. I just really needed to share that you being so honest has made me feel so much more normal. That "functional" identity is so engrained, especially in a capitalist system. We are all being expected to work at literally 110% and neglecting ourselves. Add on mental health concerns and we will burn out. I hope you are able to make time to work on some healing. Trauma is a wound, even if we can't see it - and regardless of the trauma. It will impact you, and neglecting it will only make it deeper. Sorry for rambling, but this hits so home for me and these are some of the things that help me remember that these "disorders" are normal responses to abnormal situations. They have helped us survive, and breaks can be what we need to survive.
I have pdd but I feel sadness. Now I feel mostly nothing because I'm on meds. Like not completely nothing but my emotions aren't as dramatic as before. I also also wish I was dead everyday and am tired of living. It's so exhausting and therapy hasn't helped. Neither has tons of different meds.